# This or That Questions: Adults, Flirty and Spicy Editions (18+)

Source: https://thisorthatquestion.com/spicy-this-or-that-questions
Updated: 2026-11-11

For adults 18 and over. The pairs start flirty and get bolder as you scroll, and anyone can skip any question.

## Quick facts

- Spicy this or that questions are for adults 18 and over. Play them only with people who have agreed to the topic.
- Start with this or that flirty questions. Move to sexual this or that questions only after both people say yes to more heat.
- Any player can pass on any question without explaining why. A pass is an answer too.
- Over text, flirty this or that questions work best one pair at a time, with your own answer sent first.
- Agree on a safe word or a simple "skip" before you play the kinky edition, even as a game.

## This or that questions for adults: flirty starters

Open with these flirty this or that questions. They test attraction without getting personal, so they work on a second date or with a new match.

Many of them double as flirty this or that questions to ask a guy you like.

1. Wink or Smirk?
2. Compliment on looks or Compliment on brains?
3. Butterflies or Fireworks?
4. Eye contact across the room or Note on a napkin?
5. Make the first move or Wait for them?
6. Dimples or Freckles?
7. Their laugh or Their smile?
8. Hug from behind or Hand on the knee?
9. Morning voice or Late-night phone voice?
10. Playful teasing or Sweet compliments?
11. Dancing close or Dancing silly?
12. All dressed up or Messy hair and a T-shirt?
13. Cheesy pickup line or Smooth one-liner?
14. Flirt in person or Flirt over text?

## This or that spicy questions for couples

These this or that spicy questions for couples turn up the heat a notch. Ask them at home, not at a dinner party.

1. Shower together or Bath together?
2. Make out in the car or Make out in the rain?
3. Slow kisses or Hungry kisses?
4. Lingerie or Just your T-shirt?
5. Massage oil or Scented candles?
6. Bedroom or Somewhere new?
7. Lights on or Lights off?
8. Sweet talk or Dirty talk?
9. Hotel room or Cabin in the woods?
10. Skinny dipping or Hot tub?
11. Tease all day or Surprise at night?
12. PDA or Save it for later?
13. Neck kisses or Ear whispers?
14. Slow dance or Lap dance?

## Sexy this or that questions about attraction

These this or that sexy questions focus on what catches your eye. Both partners answer, then explain what they like about their pick.

1. Black lace or Red silk?
2. Boxers or Briefs?
3. Silk sheets or Flannel sheets?
4. Back rub or Foot rub?
5. Bite your lip or Run a hand through your hair?
6. Whispering or Long eye contact?
7. Cuddle naked or Cuddle in pajamas?
8. Abs or Arms?
9. Collarbones or Lower back?
10. Perfume or Natural scent?
11. Sexy voice note or Sexy selfie?
12. Strip poker or Truth or dare?
13. Slow undress or Clothes off fast?
14. Tan lines or No tan lines?

## Dirty this or that questions for couples

This or that dirty questions belong between partners who already talk openly. Keep them suggestive: the answer is a preference, not a description.

1. Kitchen counter or Couch?
2. Quickie or All night?
3. Slow and gentle or Fast and rough?
4. Take the lead or Let them lead?
5. Hickeys or No evidence?
6. Wake-up call or Nightcap?
7. Loud or Mind the neighbors?
8. Bed or Floor?
9. Back seat or Elevator?
10. Talk the whole time or Total silence?
11. Dirty text at work or Dirty whisper at dinner?
12. Toys or No toys?

## This or that sex edition questions

These this or that sex questions cover habits and preferences. Couples use them to find out what the other person wants without a serious sit-down talk.

1. Long warm-up or Straight to it?
2. Spontaneous or Scheduled?
3. Cuddle after or Shower after?
4. Music on or Music off?
5. Initiate or Be seduced?
6. Snack after or Sleep after?
7. Quality or Quantity?
8. Try something new or Perfect the classics?
9. Phone sex or Sexting?
10. Weekend in bed or Getaway weekend?
11. Lingerie gift or Toy gift?
12. First base or Home run?

## Freaky this or that questions

These this or that freaky questions add props and odd places. Laughing at a pair is a fine answer.

1. Whipped cream or Chocolate syrup?
2. Ice cubes or Warm oil?
3. Feathers or Fingernails?
4. Outdoors or Hotel balcony?
5. Mile-high club or Beach at night?
6. Hair pull or Neck bite?
7. Spanking or Tickling?
8. Edible underwear or Body paint?
9. Dirty dice or Naughty card game?
10. Mirror or Blackout curtains?
11. Costume party or Masquerade mask?

## This or that kinky edition

Play the kinky edition only after you agree on a safe word. "Red" for stop and "yellow" for slow down are common choices.

1. Blindfold or Handcuffs?
2. Dominant or Submissive?
3. Strangers at a bar or Boss after hours?
4. Leather or Lace?
5. Tie up or Be tied up?
6. Tease or Be teased?
7. Silk tie or Satin rope?
8. Wax play or Ice play?
9. Planned scene or Make it up as you go?
10. Give orders or Follow orders?
11. Safe word: Red or Safe word: Pineapple?

## Juicy this or that questions about your past

Juicy this or that questions dig into dating history and secrets. They work with a partner or a group of adult friends who all agreed to play.

1. Tell your body count or Take it to the grave?
2. Show your search history or Read your last text aloud?
3. Most awkward kiss or Worst date story?
4. Crush on a friend or Crush on a coworker?
5. Ghosted someone or Been ghosted?
6. Kiss and tell or Keep it secret?
7. Hookup or Relationship?
8. Ex as a friend or Ex as a stranger?
9. Share a fantasy or Hear their fantasy?
10. Walk of shame or Stay for breakfast?
11. Celebrity crush or Fictional crush?
12. First kiss story or Last kiss story?

## This or that questions adults flirty over text can try

Send these as single texts. Answer each one yourself in the same message so the other person has something to reply to.

1. Flirty emoji or Flirty GIF?
2. Good-morning selfie or Good-night voice note?
3. Spicy text or Spicy call?
4. Text at work or Text at midnight?
5. Wink emoji or Peach emoji?
6. Thirst trap or Cute selfie?
7. Slide into DMs or Wait for them to slide?
8. Read receipts on or Read receipts off?
9. Long flirty paragraph or One-word tease?
10. Tell me in person or Tell me right now?

## How to play sex this or that games with consent

1. Confirm that everyone playing is 18 or older and wants a spicy game, not a regular one.
2. Agree on how far you will go: flirty only, spicy, or the full this or that sex edition.
3. Set one skip rule. Anyone can say "pass" and the next person reads a new pair.
4. Start with the flirty starters and move down the page one section at a time.
5. Check in after each section with a quick "Keep going?"
6. Stop when one person wants to stop, even mid-round.

## NSFW this or that tips: comfort and privacy

- Play sexual this or that questions with a partner or close friends who opted in, never with coworkers or strangers.
- Keep this or that questions spicy, not graphic. A pick and a grin say enough.
- Do not screenshot or share someone's answers. Treat them like a private conversation.
- Skip the juicy section with a new partner if past relationships are a sore spot.
- Keep drinks light. People make clearer choices about what to share when they are sober.
- Use naughty this or that questions as a starting point, then talk about any answer that surprised you.

## Frequently asked questions

### What are spicy this or that questions?

Spicy this or that questions are flirty or suggestive two-option questions for adults, such as Lights on or Lights off and Quickie or All night. Couples and dating matches use them to talk about attraction in a light way. They are for players 18 and over who have agreed to the topic.

### Are these this or that questions for couples flirty or explicit?

They are flirty and suggestive, not explicit. Each pair names a preference, such as Slow kisses or Hungry kisses, without describing anything graphic. The dirty and kinky sections run hotter, so save them for a partner who has said yes to that level.

### How do I make this or that questions flirty without making it weird?

Start light and let the other person set the pace. Open with pairs like Dimples or Freckles and Their laugh or Their smile. If they answer with energy and ask one back, move to the spicy section. If they give short answers, stay flirty.

### What are good this or that questions for boyfriend flirty texts?

Good flirty texts for a boyfriend include Hug from behind or Hand on the knee, Black lace or Red silk, and Good-morning selfie or Good-night voice note. Send one pair per text with your own answer. Save the sex edition pairs for when you are both in the mood.

### How do I keep this or that questions dirty but not crude?

Keep each option to a place, a mood or a preference, never a body description. Kitchen counter or Couch is playful; a graphic option is not. Let the follow-up conversation carry the detail, and only when both people want it.

### What are this or that sex related questions that stay tasteful?

Tasteful this or that sex related questions ask about habits, not acts: Spontaneous or Scheduled, Cuddle after or Shower after, Try something new or Perfect the classics. They let partners compare preferences without a single graphic word.

### Is the this or that spicy edition okay for a party?

Only for an adult party where every guest agreed to a spicy game. Use the flirty and juicy sections in a group. Keep the dirty, sex edition and kinky sections for couples in private, because group members rarely share the same comfort level.

### Where can I find this or that dirty questions spicy enough for a bachelorette party?

Use the juicy and freaky sections at a bachelorette party, such as Walk of shame or Stay for breakfast and Whipped cream or Chocolate syrup. Ask the bride beforehand which topics are off limits, and skip anything about past partners if family members attend.

### What makes this or that questions juicy?

This or that questions juicy enough to remember make each player admit something, such as Ghosted someone or Been ghosted. The story behind the pick is the payoff. Keep juicy pairs about your own life, never about a friend's secret.

### Are there dirty this or that questions for couples who have been together for years?

Yes. Long-term couples often get the most from this or that sexual questions for couples, because both partners feel safe answering honestly. Pairs like Try something new or Perfect the classics and Planned scene or Make it up as you go often lead to a real conversation.
