This or That Questions: Adults, Flirty and Spicy Editions (18+)

For adults 18 and over.

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Spicy (18+)
WinkorSmirk
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The pairs start flirty and get bolder as you scroll, and anyone can skip any question.

Jump to a section (12)
  1. This or that questions for adults: flirty starters
  2. This or that spicy questions for couples
  3. Sexy this or that questions about attraction
  4. Dirty this or that questions for couples
  5. This or that sex edition questions
  6. Freaky this or that questions
  7. This or that kinky edition
  8. Juicy this or that questions about your past
  9. This or that questions adults flirty over text can try
  10. How to play sex this or that games with consent
  11. NSFW this or that tips: comfort and privacy
  12. Frequently asked questions

This or that questions for adults: flirty starters

Open with these flirty this or that questions. They test attraction without getting personal, so they work on a second date or with a new match.

Many of them double as flirty this or that questions to ask a guy you like.

  1. WinkorSmirk?
  2. Compliment on looksorCompliment on brains?
  3. ButterfliesorFireworks?
  4. Eye contact across the roomorNote on a napkin?
  5. Make the first moveorWait for them?
  6. DimplesorFreckles?
  7. Their laughorTheir smile?
  8. Hug from behindorHand on the knee?
  9. Morning voiceorLate-night phone voice?
  10. Playful teasingorSweet compliments?
  11. Dancing closeorDancing silly?
  12. All dressed uporMessy hair and a T-shirt?
  13. Cheesy pickup lineorSmooth one-liner?
  14. Flirt in personorFlirt over text?
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This or that spicy questions for couples

These this or that spicy questions for couples turn up the heat a notch. Ask them at home, not at a dinner party.

  1. Shower togetherorBath together?
  2. Make out in the carorMake out in the rain?
  3. Slow kissesorHungry kisses?
  4. LingerieorJust your T-shirt?
  5. Massage oilorScented candles?
  6. BedroomorSomewhere new?
  7. Lights onorLights off?
  8. Sweet talkorDirty talk?
  9. Hotel roomorCabin in the woods?
  10. Skinny dippingorHot tub?
  11. Tease all dayorSurprise at night?
  12. PDAorSave it for later?
  13. Neck kissesorEar whispers?
  14. Slow danceorLap dance?

Sexy this or that questions about attraction

These this or that sexy questions focus on what catches your eye. Both partners answer, then explain what they like about their pick.

  1. Black laceorRed silk?
  2. BoxersorBriefs?
  3. Silk sheetsorFlannel sheets?
  4. Back ruborFoot rub?
  5. Bite your liporRun a hand through your hair?
  6. WhisperingorLong eye contact?
  7. Cuddle nakedorCuddle in pajamas?
  8. AbsorArms?
  9. CollarbonesorLower back?
  10. PerfumeorNatural scent?
  11. Sexy voice noteorSexy selfie?
  12. Strip pokerorTruth or dare?
  13. Slow undressorClothes off fast?
  14. Tan linesorNo tan lines?

Dirty this or that questions for couples

This or that dirty questions belong between partners who already talk openly. Keep them suggestive: the answer is a preference, not a description.

  1. Kitchen counterorCouch?
  2. QuickieorAll night?
  3. Slow and gentleorFast and rough?
  4. Take the leadorLet them lead?
  5. HickeysorNo evidence?
  6. Wake-up callorNightcap?
  7. LoudorMind the neighbors?
  8. BedorFloor?
  9. Back seatorElevator?
  10. Talk the whole timeorTotal silence?
  11. Dirty text at workorDirty whisper at dinner?
  12. ToysorNo toys?

This or that sex edition questions

These this or that sex questions cover habits and preferences. Couples use them to find out what the other person wants without a serious sit-down talk.

  1. Long warm-uporStraight to it?
  2. SpontaneousorScheduled?
  3. Cuddle afterorShower after?
  4. Music onorMusic off?
  5. InitiateorBe seduced?
  6. Snack afterorSleep after?
  7. QualityorQuantity?
  8. Try something neworPerfect the classics?
  9. Phone sexorSexting?
  10. Weekend in bedorGetaway weekend?
  11. Lingerie giftorToy gift?
  12. First baseorHome run?

Freaky this or that questions

These this or that freaky questions add props and odd places. Laughing at a pair is a fine answer.

  1. Whipped creamorChocolate syrup?
  2. Ice cubesorWarm oil?
  3. FeathersorFingernails?
  4. OutdoorsorHotel balcony?
  5. Mile-high cluborBeach at night?
  6. Hair pullorNeck bite?
  7. SpankingorTickling?
  8. Edible underwearorBody paint?
  9. Dirty diceorNaughty card game?
  10. MirrororBlackout curtains?
  11. Costume partyorMasquerade mask?

This or that kinky edition

Play the kinky edition only after you agree on a safe word. "Red" for stop and "yellow" for slow down are common choices.

  1. BlindfoldorHandcuffs?
  2. DominantorSubmissive?
  3. Strangers at a barorBoss after hours?
  4. LeatherorLace?
  5. Tie uporBe tied up?
  6. TeaseorBe teased?
  7. Silk tieorSatin rope?
  8. Wax playorIce play?
  9. Planned sceneorMake it up as you go?
  10. Give ordersorFollow orders?
  11. Safe word: RedorSafe word: Pineapple?

Juicy this or that questions about your past

Juicy this or that questions dig into dating history and secrets. They work with a partner or a group of adult friends who all agreed to play.

  1. Tell your body countorTake it to the grave?
  2. Show your search historyorRead your last text aloud?
  3. Most awkward kissorWorst date story?
  4. Crush on a friendorCrush on a coworker?
  5. Ghosted someoneorBeen ghosted?
  6. Kiss and tellorKeep it secret?
  7. HookuporRelationship?
  8. Ex as a friendorEx as a stranger?
  9. Share a fantasyorHear their fantasy?
  10. Walk of shameorStay for breakfast?
  11. Celebrity crushorFictional crush?
  12. First kiss storyorLast kiss story?

This or that questions adults flirty over text can try

Send these as single texts. Answer each one yourself in the same message so the other person has something to reply to.

  1. Flirty emojiorFlirty GIF?
  2. Good-morning selfieorGood-night voice note?
  3. Spicy textorSpicy call?
  4. Text at workorText at midnight?
  5. Wink emojiorPeach emoji?
  6. Thirst traporCute selfie?
  7. Slide into DMsorWait for them to slide?
  8. Read receipts onorRead receipts off?
  9. Long flirty paragraphorOne-word tease?
  10. Tell me in personorTell me right now?

How to play sex this or that games with consent

  1. Confirm that everyone playing is 18 or older and wants a spicy game, not a regular one.
  2. Agree on how far you will go: flirty only, spicy, or the full this or that sex edition.
  3. Set one skip rule. Anyone can say "pass" and the next person reads a new pair.
  4. Start with the flirty starters and move down the page one section at a time.
  5. Check in after each section with a quick "Keep going?"
  6. Stop when one person wants to stop, even mid-round.

NSFW this or that tips: comfort and privacy

  • Play sexual this or that questions with a partner or close friends who opted in, never with coworkers or strangers.
  • Keep this or that questions spicy, not graphic. A pick and a grin say enough.
  • Do not screenshot or share someone's answers. Treat them like a private conversation.
  • Skip the juicy section with a new partner if past relationships are a sore spot.
  • Keep drinks light. People make clearer choices about what to share when they are sober.
  • Use naughty this or that questions as a starting point, then talk about any answer that surprised you.

Frequently asked questions

What are spicy this or that questions?

Spicy this or that questions are flirty or suggestive two-option questions for adults, such as Lights on or Lights off and Quickie or All night. Couples and dating matches use them to talk about attraction in a light way. They are for players 18 and over who have agreed to the topic.

They are flirty and suggestive, not explicit. Each pair names a preference, such as Slow kisses or Hungry kisses, without describing anything graphic. The dirty and kinky sections run hotter, so save them for a partner who has said yes to that level.

Start light and let the other person set the pace. Open with pairs like Dimples or Freckles and Their laugh or Their smile. If they answer with energy and ask one back, move to the spicy section. If they give short answers, stay flirty.

Good flirty texts for a boyfriend include Hug from behind or Hand on the knee, Black lace or Red silk, and Good-morning selfie or Good-night voice note. Send one pair per text with your own answer. Save the sex edition pairs for when you are both in the mood.

Keep each option to a place, a mood or a preference, never a body description. Kitchen counter or Couch is playful; a graphic option is not. Let the follow-up conversation carry the detail, and only when both people want it.

Tasteful this or that sex related questions ask about habits, not acts: Spontaneous or Scheduled, Cuddle after or Shower after, Try something new or Perfect the classics. They let partners compare preferences without a single graphic word.

Only for an adult party where every guest agreed to a spicy game. Use the flirty and juicy sections in a group. Keep the dirty, sex edition and kinky sections for couples in private, because group members rarely share the same comfort level.

Use the juicy and freaky sections at a bachelorette party, such as Walk of shame or Stay for breakfast and Whipped cream or Chocolate syrup. Ask the bride beforehand which topics are off limits, and skip anything about past partners if family members attend.

This or that questions juicy enough to remember make each player admit something, such as Ghosted someone or Been ghosted. The story behind the pick is the payoff. Keep juicy pairs about your own life, never about a friend's secret.

Yes. Long-term couples often get the most from this or that sexual questions for couples, because both partners feel safe answering honestly. Pairs like Try something new or Perfect the classics and Planned scene or Make it up as you go often lead to a real conversation.

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